Diamond Hands? More Like 'Please Take This Off My Hands': Nakamoto Company Sells 284 BTC at a Discount While Strategy Catches Some Z's

In a week where someone apparently decided their Bitcoin wasn't quite sparkly enough at current prices, two of crypto's biggest players showed us what diversification looks like when your portfolio has commitment issues. One company hit the sell button like it was fleeing a burning building, while the other continued its legendary relationship with digital gold—because apparently, you can check out anytime you want, but you can never leave.

The "Nakamoto" company—reportedly linked to David Bailey—decided to part ways with approximately 284 Bitcoin for $20 million in March 2026. Their average sale price of $70,422 per coin is notably lower than their average cost basis of $118,171. For those doing the math at home, that's roughly a 40% discount on their investment. Nothing says "confident exit strategy" like selling at a loss to fund your business adventures. The proceeds will support operational activities, boost business investments, and cover costs from recent mergers. Not exactly the "buy high, sell higher" strategy we'd all dreamed of, but hey, sometimes you need the cash more than you need to win a Reddit argument about DCA.

As of December 31, 2025, the company still held roughly 1,625 free Bitcoin worth approximately $142.2 million, along with $22.6 million in cash and $20.7 million in publicly traded stock. So it's not like they're going full fiat maximalist—just dabbling in the ancient art of "maybe this is enough volatility for one fiscal quarter."

Meanwhile, over in the land of Saylor, Strategy filed its latest SEC Form 8-K on March 30, 2026, reporting absolutely nothing happened between March 23-29. No Bitcoin purchases. No equity sales. Just... vibes. One might say the company is experiencing what married couples call "the