BitMine’s 12% Pop Was a Short Squeeze, Not a Lambo Moment (Yet)

BitMine Immersion Technologies (BMNR) surged 12% on March 31, limping into the close at $19.78 — its most exciting day since your last airdrop actually paid out. The jump came after B. Riley got bullish, bumping that price target to $33 from $30, while simultaneously watching the put-call ratio faceplant from 1.04 on March 27 — a hearty "we're totally doomed" signal from the options crowd — down to 0.52 by Monday. Open interest? Steady at 0.47. So basically, no new blood showed up to the party. The bears just got their exit interview revoked.

Translation for those who speak fluent hopium: nobody new minting conviction here. The shorts just got rekt and scrambled to cover their puts. This was a textbook short squeeze — one part panic, one part positions getting murdered — not some glorious institutional FOMO parade complete with Lambo emojis. The volume was theater, not revolution.

But hey, BitMine wasn't just sitting around eating crayons. The company scooped up 71,179 $ETH last week — its fattest haul of 2026, for those keeping score — bringing its war chest to