Bitcoin Gets Cockblocked by $70K Again While Trump Threatens to Turn Iran Into a Dark Mode Server

Bitcoin tried to break above $70,000 on Monday, hitting $70,275 on Bitstamp — new April highs! — only to get slapped back down by the market's favorite pastime: profit-taking. The king of crypto touched the magic number, briefly flexed on the weekly chart, and then immediately got rekt by the same degens who bought the dip last week. Classic BTC behavior, honestly.

US-Iran war jitters kept both stocks and BTC wobbling at the Wall Street open. At a military event, President Trump doubled down on his Iran ultimatum, telling reporters the country would have "no bridges" and "no power plants" unless a deal was reached. The Tuesday 8pm ET deadline is still ticking. Nothing says "market stability" like geopolitical countdowns and threats to delete a country's infrastructure.

Glassnode pointed the finger at internal market forces, noting that as price probed the $70K region, Realized Profit/hour spiked above $20M — a clear signal of local exhaustion. "Every approach to the $70k–$80K band meets thin liquidity and profit-taking pressure, capping the bounce," the analytics platform observed on X. Translation: every time BTC tries to get freaky above $70K, a bunch of panicked hands hit the sell button so fast it creates its own gravitational pull back down.

Pseudonymous trader LP noted that Mondays and Thursdays have consistently marked the upper and lower ends of the weekly trading range throughout 2026. "If the correlation continues to play out, this would suggest Thursday forms the low of the week," they said. So there you have it — Bitcoin is basically trading on a weekday schedule now. Respect the macro.

Crypto trader Michaël Van de Poppe wasn't bearish, though. "If Bitcoin breaks $71K, then markets are in for a test at $80K," he wrote, pointing to strong momentum and potential fireworks as the Strait of Hormuz situation reaches its climax. He also noted that with markets oversold and on-chain indicators looking similar to bottom areas in 2018, 2020, and 2022, a relief run could flip sentiment quickly. Essentially: we might be in for a spicy bounce if the geopolitical situation doesn't torch everything first.

Meanwhile, Trump escalated the rhetoric further, claiming the US could "take out" Iran in one night. His conditions? Free oil flow through the Strait of Hormuz must be guaranteed. Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth announced Monday would bring the largest number of strikes since the war began, with Tuesday's operations set to exceed that. Nothing like a Monday morning military briefing to really get those risk assets moving.

Prediction markets aren't optimistic about a quick resolution. Polymarket gives just 3% odds of a ceasefire by April 7, rising to 28% by April 30 and 76% by year-end. So basically, we might get peace by 2026, assuming we survive 2025. Solid odds.

So here we are: Bitcoin trapped between $70K resistance and geopolitical chaos. Fun times. It's almost like combining a fragile market structure with international brinkmanship creates the perfect environment for a leveraged wipeout. Who could've seen this coming? (Everyone saw this coming.)