Coinbase Drops 25 Altcoins From Futures Roster—Not Even a Goodbye Party

Coinbase just went full Marie Kondo on their altcoin futures list, and 25 tokens just learned they don't spark joy anymore. The exchange announced it's pulling the plug on perpetual futures trading for these assets, affecting both Coinbase Advanced and Coinbase International Exchange. The execution date? April 21 at 13:00 UTC—mark your calendars, set your alarms, and maybe start drafting your goodbye tweets.

For those keeping score at home, here's the honor roll of tokens getting yeeted from the platform: TRB-PERP, RARE-PERP, NEIRO-PERP, A-PERP, ME-PERP, XTZ-PERP, KMNO-PERP, RAY-PERP, STX-PERP, ENS-PERP, GMT-PERP, SNX-PERP, 1000FLOKI-PERP, 0G-PERP, ORDI-PERP, NIL-PERP, BIO-PERP, UMA-PERP, BEAM-PERP, INIT-PERP, SOMI-PERP, EGLD-PERP, CLANKER-PERP, SOPH-PERP, and BIGTIME-PERP. Goodnight, sweet princes.

Got open positions in any of these gems? Coinbase is closing them automatically when the music stops. The settlement price gets calculated using the average index price from the final hour of trading—because apparently nothing says "we're serious about this" like some good old-fashioned math. Funding rates get flattened to zero during that last funding period too. Zero fees to the grave, at least.

And that's a wrap, folks. Coinbase continuing its proud tradition of making tough love look like corporate housekeeping. *This is absolutely not financial advice—just vibes and a healthy dose of skepticism.